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My cousin, my sister, my friend

 There is no HIS story unless you tell HER story, Part VII:  My cousin, my sister, my friend (Latitia Owens)


As an only child, I’ve never really known what life is like to have siblings.  I can only imagine periods of ups and downs.  I can only imagine periods of push backs, fights, falling outs, and support.  As my wife (who has 3 brothers) tells me, you really don’t appreciate the dynamics of having siblings.


So, the closest I have had are friends, frat brothers, and family.   And in my family, the one sibling that stands out is Latitia.  


We started spending time with each other when we were around 5 or 6 years old (She is about 8 months younger than me).  Her father was my mom’s big brother.  She lived in Little Rock (AR) and I lived in Pine Bluff (AR) (about 45 miles away but for me, it felt like a million miles).  We saw each other during the big 3 holidays (the 4th, Thanksgiving, and Christmas).   At an early age, we would try to figure out ways for me to come to her house to hang out a few days.  We were successful most times.


Let me clear about one thing. Latitia was ALWAYS the cool kid.   She was the popular kid that other kids rallied around.  Even though she went to an all girls Catholic school, she had friends at virtually all of the High Schools in LIttle Rock (which was about 6 or 7 in Little Rock).  She played sports.  She was a cheerleader.  She was a dancer.  And she was brilliant academically.   



She may have been a force of nature in her world, but the one thing she NEVER did was treat me other than me.  When she had her 16th Birthday party, she invited me.  Here I am in a room full of popular kids from around Little Rock and I truly felt like I didn’t belong.  And when I had one of my ‘shy, insecure, I’m going to go upstairs because no one will miss me’, she came upstairs and got me to dance with her.  (How much of a loser am I? My first dance with a girl is my cousin?? Geez! Lol).  


That’s Latitia.  We had that connection.   


And that connection got stronger when got older.


Her mother used to tell my mother how amazed at how we managed to stay so connected and aware of what was going on in our lives.


In the summers between college semesters, we both found ourselves working at Chili’s Bar & Grill (I encouraged her to apply after I worked there the previous summer).  I washed the dishes and she did prep work.  


We both pledged in college.  I pledged Alpha Phi Alpha and the next year she pledged Alpha Kappa Alpha.


When she got married, she made sure I was in her wedding so I drove from Florida to Arkansas.


When I got married, I asked her to be my “Best Woman” and she flew from California to Florida.


And along the way, we have managed to have a host of conversations and interactions.   In 2019, I flew to California to see what her life was like on the ‘WEST SIDE’ and just spend time with her.


We all can point to that one relative we have that is ‘our person’ who becomes more than just a blood relative.  


In my life, that relative, that cousin, that sister, that friend is Latitia.


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